Reports Of Cookie Monster’s Demise Were Greatly Exaggerated
Before we get to my rant, let me just say: who doesn’t love Cookie Monster? No counting, no singing, no politics, no angst……..just pure, unadulterated gluttony. Cookie Monster speaks to that monster inside all of us who, when the tray of tiny passed appetizers comes our way at a crowded party, would love to messily devour all of them in one fell swoop “OM NOM NOM NOM!” Of course we do not, as we are constrained by the mores of polite society, so we take one and also the obligatory napkin, then wait hungrily for the next tray to happen by.
Several years ago, there was a report that Cookie Monster was going to be phased out of Sesame Street, and would instead turn into “Veggie Monster,” who would presumably teach fat diabetic kids the error of their ways by devouring brussels sprouts, cabbage, parsnips, etc. in his characteristic manner. This report turned out to be false, and the story has since been thoroughly debunked. That did not stop a huge groundswell of outrage from forming, which has persisted to this day, perpetuated by Facebook and people’s apparent need to create endless moronic Facebook pages devoted to their pet causes (for example, see here and here and here). Passions run strong when it comes to Cookie Monster, as illustrated on some of these pages:
“They say the cookie monster promotes obesity! WELL AT LEAST HE’LL DIE HAPPY!”
“veggie monster should go take syanide and jump into a hole”
“haha the number one reason cookie monster likes cookies so much is because…… hes a stoner”
Just to set the record straight: Cookie Monster is alive and well and living on Sesame Street! There is no “Veggie Monster,” and there never was.
He still eats cookies with gusto. At most, he has slightly reframed his message, as he now acknowledges that cookies are a “sometime food.”
If you have actually watched this clip through to the end, you will observe that Cookie Monster ultimately eats the cookie, despite the singing anthropomorphic fruit dancing temptingly in front of him. It is clear that his primal nature remains unchanged. This is consistent with his interview with Matt Lauer in August 2006:
Cookie Monster: Me like fruit.
Matt Lauer: And there you have it. Cookie Monster likes fruit, and not cookies.
Monster: No! You members of the media blow story way out of proportion! Me still like cookies!
Lauer: Then why fruit?
Monster: Why not fruit? It delicious! And healthy. Me still eat cookies, like me world-famous for doing, but now me eat other things, too.
So the next time some blowhard starts ranting and raving about how Veggie Monster replaced Cookie Monster, you can say “hey, jerk – you’re wrong!” And the world will be a better place.
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